Do Not Speak English in Japan!

Perpetuating the use of Japanese language is like insisting a nation commute on a filthy coal-fired steam engine, while the perfectly acceptable options of light rail transit systems running on renewable sources are readily available.

In Japan You Must Speak Japanese; Not English!

A few weeks ago, well before the latest rape saga in Okinawa, a cocky Japanifik native driving a subsonic septic tank on wheels said to Gacuette: “In Japan You Must Speak Japanese; Not English!” Or words to that effect.

Gacuette’s short sharp response to the native driver, who was in all probability a right-wing thug keen on starting another war his masters cannot win, is neither worth repeating, nor the issue.

What is at issue is the legitimacy of Japanese as an acceptable world language. Should a language be considered as legitimate just because a single group of people with identical ritualistic thought pattern speak it? Why must the Japanese be forced to learn their difficult and illogical language without an intelligent alternative being made available to them? Why indeed should anyone be condemned to speak the jumbled language when intelligent options are readily available? Ironically, people from different parts of Japan would not understand each other if they conversed in their local dialects.

A deadweight tongue, Japanese is an illogical and, frankly, unintelligent language. It is a very difficult language to read, write or express oneself. It’s a harsh-sounding, indirect and inexpressive language filled with ‘K’s and ‘Y’s, as if when they were giving away the rest of the alphabet the local daimyos were too busy killing each other. All and all, it wouldn’t make an iota of difference to the world, if Japanese language ceased to exist tomorrow at 10:00am. If anything, Japanese people would be liberated from the curse of their haphazard, forced-upon language.

All major civilizations in the world have enriched humanity with their literature, poetry and culture except for the Japanese (and perhaps the Spanish). When was the last time Japanese literature had something to offer the world? Who exactly is the Japanese counterpart for any one of the following authors:

Aldous Huxley, Alexandre Dumas, Alexis de Tocqueville, Al-Hallaj, Anatole France, Anna Akhmatova, Antoine de Saint, Attar, Baba Tahir, Balzac, Boris Vian, Camus, Chrétien de Troyes, Daniel Defoe, Dostoevsky, Edgar Allan Poe, Edward Bellamy, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Socrates, Plato, Aquino, Francis Bacon, René Descartes, Manzoni, Emily Dickinson, Erich Kästner, Michael Ende, Ernest Hemingway, Ezra Pound, Lord Byron, de Chateaubriand, Goethe, Gustave Flaubert, Guy de Maupassant, H.G. Wells, Hardy, Henry Adams, Ivan Bunin, Jami, James Joyce, Jean Genet, Jean-Jacques Rousseau, John Bunyan, Jean-Paul Sartre, John Steinbeck, Joseph Heller, Kurt Vonnegut, La Fontaine, Louis-Ferdinand Céline, Lowell, Rumi, Marcel Proust, Margaret Mitchell, P.G. Wodehouse, Mark Twain, Maxim Gorky, Michael Ende, Nietzsche, Omar Khayyam, Orwell, Oscar Wilde, Pasternak, Paul Ernst, Pushkin, Robert Frost, Rudaki, William Blake, Sa’di, Samuel Beckett, Schiller, Shakespeare, Stendhal, T. S. Eliot, Tolstoy, Somerset Maugham, Turgenev, Upton Sinclair, William Makepeace Thackeray, Alfred Tennyson, Walt Whitman, Victor Hugo, William Faulkner, Voltaire, Wordsworth, Yeats, Percy Shelley, Zola, Robert Burns, Charles Dickens, Kingsley Amis, Dylan Thomas, Samuel Beckett, Lewis Carroll, Bernard Shaw, Rudyard Kipling, Evelyn Waugh, Harold Pinter . . .

Don’t bother looking because you won’t find any. Why not? Is it because the Japanese are less intelligent than other races? Well, not necessarily [despite the 2-digit IQ of some of the people in Chiba and Japanifik!] Could it be that Japan’s oppressive ruling class, its repressive culture and their ‘perfect’ tool of mass suppression, their lifeless, retarded, inferior language preventing them from producing world class authors, poets . . .? Judge for yourself.

See Part 2.

Learning Japanese: Vasectomy of the Fertile Mind

Just Had a Déjà vu

“This is like deja vu all over again.” ~ Yogi Berra

And what triggered it off were three words: Korean, manual, removal.

The guy who would have been Korea’s first astronaut bit the dust, nearly. He was demoted to the role of support astronaut when his Russian hosts discovered he had taken a training manual out of a Russian space training center without permission and accidentally (!) sent it to his home in South Korea in September [presumably his mother wanted to know how the Soyuz worked!]

Ko again violated the training center regulations by [again accidentally] studying unauthorized materials.

“Yi So-yeon during a training session in Russia on March 7.
She has replaced first choice Ko San to be Korea’s first person
in space.” [Credit: YONHAP]

Déjà vu

A while back a Japanese client of Gacuette’s was approached by a Korean engineering company to license a patent for the Korean market. The Korean management team were invited to Japan, wined, dined and “karaoked” at expensive hostess bars. Toward the end of their final meeting before departure something odd happened. The six Koreans simultaneously opened their briefcases and populated the conference table with the contents. Gacuette made a quick eye survey of the Japanese manuals on the table noting the total number. Lo and behold, as the Koreans were leaving, another quick count revealed a new, fewer total: An important data book had accidentally disappeared.

Immediately, a junior employee was dispatched after the Koreans. She met them in the parking lot as they were about to buckle up and retrieved the manual.

San Ko Demoted for removing a training manual
from a Russian space center and [accidentally]
sending it to Korea! And for [accidentally] studying
another manual he was not authorized to read.